Sometimes you do things (magical or otherwise) that leave you empty. I don’t just mean you need a few days to recover. I mean months… maybe even a year?

I bought a house last spring and it is slowly but surely becoming a home for Tiny Witch and I. Currently my magickal practice is mostly dormant and lacking even though I have set some things up and celebrated a Sabbat or two since living here. I have yet to unpack my business which I had to put to sleep during the “house finding/mortgage approval” stage. To say that buying a house is exhausting is very much an understatement which I am sure many can attest to. When I walked into this house I just knew that I would stop at nothing to get it which of course makes the exhaustion worth it — mostly.

I may have dabbled in some major league exhaustive magic to assist myself in getting this house. I had other witches involved even (which I normally would not do for self gain). And yes, I got the house, they chose me (despite other offers)! And how did I pay? (aside from draining my savings) I got SO SICK. Sinus infection, followed by pneumonia, followed by COVID all while I was trying to MOVE INTO this house. We had to stop and wait until I was well right in the middle of it all. Just as I was feeling human again planning to get more things moved in, I sprained my ankle. Was it because I was stressed and working too much? Absolutely. Was it a spirit guide telling me to slow the heck down? Most certainly. Was it the law of returns? NO doubt in MY mind.

It wasn’t until a rather odd ritual I had last Samhain that anyone’s energy who may or may not belong to this house presented themselves. Please note that this is odd to me. I’d seen the older gentleman, who appears to have been a crossdresser in life wandering the vacant lot next to my house. But nothing INSIDE my house until my first Samhain in it. Squirrel, I am calling them, because it just felt like something or someone was trying to distract me away from the ritual I was attempting. Also because it may have just been my own brain. Apparently I was far to solemn I guess? There was mugwort* tea/smoke involved which seems to get me to a somewhat altered space, but it’s never been quite so silly feeling. Maybe Squirrel is Fae and noticed a space for trickery. It happens. It feels strange, though, that I haven’t had more experiences, but I am not going to lie, I have been spent magically and physically. Maybe the guides are shielding me until I can get my health in gear again.

I completed 2023 with so many injuries, 2 rounds of GI illness in December, and 3 trips to the ER total over the year. Surgery to fix one of the injuries is in the planning phases currently and it still feels like I am healing everywhere else.

Needless to say it does feel like I might be paying some sort of karmic debt. Not necessarily being punished but giving up some energy to balance out the amount that I borrowed. That’s the hope anyways…. because I would be SO SO sad if this house (and anyone lingering therein) just doesn’t like me as much as I like it! 😉

*please note that I am not recommending mugwort tea or inhaling mugwort smoke in any way for any reason, these are merely my experiences. Do your research before taking ANY herbs internally especially ones that may not be safe under certain circumstances